Today I tried to cut my finger off

Today was a first for me, I got my first stitch (Plus 4 more). On Mondays and Wednesdays, interns here at ECHO are responsible for preparing lunch for all the interns. Well today was my day to make lunch. Last night Jenna and I threw together a tasty 16, or maybe it was a 17 bean stew, which stewed in a Crockpot from 2am to noon (yes I woke up at 2am to turn the silly thing on).
Since the main course had been prepared the night before, all I had to do was make some rice and put a fruit salad together. I diced my way through all kinds of yummy fruits from the farm; Pummelo, Carambola (Star Fruit), Banana, Cercropia Fruit, Strawberry Tree Berries, and Mango all made their way into my salad. It was nearing lunch time and I was about to put on the finishing touches, some 'Purple Possum' Passionfruit. If you have ever worked with a passionfruit before, you would know that these fruits have a very tough rind. Well I lined up to slice through this rind with a wonderfully sharp Wüsthof Chef''s Knife. I applied the necessary pressure to penetrate that tough rind, however, my Wüsthof ended up sliding across the smooth, tough rind of the Passionfruit and into my not nearly as tough finger.
I've never had stitches before, but I knew immediately without even looking I was going to need a few. I ran across the kitchen yelling (Jenna uses the term "scream" however I prefer "yell", it sounds a bit more manly). I ended up curled up around my finger next to the kitchen sink. I think I managed to mutter the words "paper towel" to Jenna between yells which I then used to wrap my gushing finger. Jenna asked me if I wanted to go to the ER, but I decided to call on our resident surgeon, Vic Estoy.
Vic volunteers here at ECHO and once worked on another finger of mine when I had a rather nasty infection from working on the farm. I figured his friendly, meticulous, and humorous medical care would be a bit more enjoyable than sitting in the ER for who knows how long. Well he set up a little sterile operating table, numbed me up, and put five stitches in. Not an adventure I care to repeat. Well at least lunch turned out alright, no one found any pieces of my finger but unfortunately I never got to add any Jackfruit to the salad... oh well.